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In a lot of my parenting consultations I find myself telling the parents that the best way to manage their concerns is to increase love and decrease consequences. This past month a parent ask me to be more specific about what love looks like for children. What did they have to do to choose love over consequences. I thought that maybe all of you would like the answer to this question so here are my answers:
My husband and I were speaking about our work. He is the Dean of Students at an independent school in Miami and I am the owner and founder of Stop Parenting Alone. We both found that we had the same experience this past month. Everyone had hit a wall. The teachers of those we each work with were asking, "When will this student finally change?" The students and my client's children were making mistakes, melting down, skipping classes, and simply making all sorts of poor choices. The parents in my parenting consultations and the online subscription were wondering what is wrong with my child, why aren't they progressing.
If you're a parent I want to recommend looking back and processing your past year in an effort to grow. Like your child, parents need to grow and expand with each passing year. Primarily to keep up with your changing and growing child but also to continue your parenting journey and development.
Often as parents we get stuck on the idea that we have to do something “special” or “out of the ordinary” for our children to have great memories. The truth is that most of us hold
I don't know about all of you but August seemed to pass by in a flash. It feels like I blinked and all of a sudden we were in September. August also felt exhausting for me primarily because I spent a lot of the month thinking about the losses I have experienced thus far and looking forward to yet another season without much change or clarity around my family and me.
Many schools, companies and media networks reached out last month for my expertise. I was both humbled and overwhelmed by the task. But I felt a great sense of gratitude that I could be that source of information for so many. I have put together the questions that seemed to repeat in all of these spaces and I want to share them with you:
My children started virtual school last week. Last week before they began, I cried because I was thinking about what they are missing out on. I remember 7th and 10th grade and what it meant for me.
But there's an important rule in parenting;
We are at a phase of these pandemic times in which decision making has become a burden and a cause of anxiety. Most of the questions I am getting from parents are around how to make the best decision for their children taking into account their children's health and their emotional well being.
This video is to help one another speak about the school decision and other difficult decisions we are making at this time. This is for grandparents, family members, and friends. There are many difficult decision that parents and families are making and there is a way to support one another without
Let’s talk about consequences. One of the most frequent questions parents ask me in workshops and consultations is what is the consequence to a child’s challenging behavior. Most ask that question because they have an inappropriate goal. They've been told that the right goal is for your child to feel bad when they're not listening or when they've made a mistake. I want you to wonder: When was the last time that you learned anything while feeling bad?
