My daughter is a soccer player. She began while only four years old, and she is still at it now. It has been breathtaking to watch her take on something that she loves and works at strenuously. However, while I am out at the games I get distracted at times by what I see on the spectator side. I understand the mood swings of the parents and family members. A sporting event is both socially and emotionally triggering, but as parents it is important to keep our children front of mind even while in the stands. The following are suggestions on how you can enjoy the game and also parent your athlete:
I was embarrassed that I had welled up to the point where my nose and my eyes could no longer function properly. I attempted not to take a huge breath or blink since tears were going to pour. From the stage I listened to Heather C. McGhee tell all of us that we needed to listen and understand one another, to meet in our humanity if there was to be true change. I began to cry because I know that this is the answer. As a psychotherapist to families and children, I sit and listen to others' humanity daily, and it always works when we listen, understand, and meet in that place of "yes, me too." However, in this moment at the We Won’t Wait Summit my tears were a mixture of McGhee stating what I believe to my soul and knowing how difficult it is for people to sit, speak, and listen to one another's experiences and feelings.
I cringed as my husband told my daughter that he would no longer help her order the next time we went to a restaurant. We have a hard and clean rule of not disagreeing in front of the children when one of us is setting a boundary, but in this situation I could not hold my tongue. I had never thought about it, but we disagreed about whether or not our children should order their own food at a restaurant.
The statistics and multiple negative outcomes of children that are disciplined with corporal punishment are well known to those who work with children. Children’s Trends, a research group, found that corporal punishment increases negative outcomes in adolescence like low academic achievement, alcohol and drug use, antisocial behavior. They also found that the older the age of the child, the greater the negative outcomes. So why do 70% of parents in the United States believe in spanking?