We are at a phase of these pandemic times in which decision making has become a burden and a cause of anxiety. Most of the questions I am getting from parents are around how to make the best decision for their children taking into account their children's health and their emotional well being.
I have found myself answering this question in similar ways no matter the individuality of the family. Parents, take care of yourself first. Your children need you to be a secure base. Children of all ages look to their parents for leadership, safety, and soothing. Who are they finding when they look to you? This truth can feel both like a burden and a possibility depending on how you are managing this time for yourself and how the external factors are influencing you. What most of us in child development circles know is that when children suffer hardship, those who fare well have one loving consistent adult around them. How can you be that loving consistent adult?
For decisions around medical health and safety - choose a source that you find reliable and make your decisions around their recommendations. Once you have decided, stay the course and remind your mind that you have made a decision when it starts giving you what ifs.
Feeling guilty about not being able to be a good worker and good parent at the same time? Don't be. At this time, you have to choose and one of them misses out when you choose the other. Instead, plan on how you will disappoint and/or manage your child or your work. Your child can handle waiting for you or feeling frustrated that you are not with them. It actually builds frustration tolerance and delay of gratification. With your work, you may need to set up routines, delegate or ask for assistance from others to manage, which will build your sense of worth and your productivity.
Staying calm and answering your children in a consistent and loving way happens when you maintain a routine, you have teamwork with the other caregivers around you, you are sleeping, eating, and finding small moments of calm as often as possible.
If this list seems overwhelming it may be a sign that you need assistance. Reach out to family, friends or professionals that can guide you to being a consistent loving adult to the children around you.