A 5th grader asks if it's normal to feel something bad every day. In this video Lina answers their question and gives recommendations.
Children and parents alike look forward to the lazy days of the summer months. We imagine happy moments in our family vacations. Children running and playing and getting popsicle mustaches. But right around the middle of July we find ourselves screaming, lecturing on the importance of being grateful for the time spent together, and overwhelmed with finding things to do. The following are tips and ways to manage these days of summer.
His little arms wrap around my neck and he tells me he loves. We tell each other that it is okay to have big feelings. We are the pair in the family that can feel happiness at a ten and anger at a ten. That day, I had been at a ten in anger and screamed at his father in front of him. I was taking the quiet moment in the evening to narrate what had happened that day. As he walked away to get into his bed I was grateful. He was six years old and had learned to accept his sensitivity and the lessons his emotions give him. At that moment I wondered, is that good or am I setting my son up for failure?
The wind is blowing my hat towards my cheek, and I can hear my children laughing with their daddy. It is an absolutely breathtaking day on Miami Beach, and I feel like crying. My mind is flooded with negative thoughts: I'm a bad mom because I won't play with them in the water and my children's memories of fun times will always include mom on the sideline watching them looking serious. It is always painful to sit in a happy place full of remorse and regret. I know this is universal for most of us as parents.
I cringed as my husband told my daughter that he would no longer help her order the next time we went to a restaurant. We have a hard and clean rule of not disagreeing in front of the children when one of us is setting a boundary, but in this situation I could not hold my tongue. I had never thought about it, but we disagreed about whether or not our children should order their own food at a restaurant.
Little people are just like big people. In this moment, my child was acting like a grown-up starting a new job. He was experiencing a kindergarten version of adult concerns: “What are these people going to be like? Will I like my boss? Am I going to be able to do the work?” In those moments it is important to take a moment and hold them and tell them that it is normal to be scared. Take that opportunity to
In my family I am the parent that spends the least amount of time with the children. Given that I am a parenting expert, the irony is laughable. However, this reality offers me insight into being the second caregiver and assuming a role incongruous to the value system of our society in which mom is the primary caregiver. It is a struggle, but I also feel grateful that my children have two parents that take on the role of caring for them first and foremost.