Question
Our 6 year old is really afraid of school fire drills. He knows which day the fire drills take place and he takes noise canceling headphones that he can put on while it’s going on but it’s that initial alarm noise that really scares him. This morning he locked himself in the bathroom because he didn’t want to go to school because it’s fire drill day. What are some techniques we can try or things we can communicate to the school to make this less scary for him? He has never liked sudden loud noises.
Answer
You're doing really well just by understanding and respecting his fear.
My suggestion is how everyone can respond when he tells you he is afraid.
Get used to answering with “yes and…” This helps the child who is stuck on a feeling, belief or rigid thought to see that their thought/feeling is correct AND there are other ways to see it as well.
For Example, “yes you feel really sad and scared right now because you remember how awful it feels to hear the fire alarm AND remember that you are safe during the fire drill so when it goes off hug yourself tight and count until the sound turns off. It takes practice to be safe in a fire, this is why the school has a drill.”
You will do this every time.