Question
We moved my soon to be 3yo daughter to a toddler bed because she would climb out of her crib.
She was doing pretty good about not getting up when we put her to sleep but now it has become a NIGHTMARE. She will not stay in her bed when put down and she wants us to stay in the room or else she gets up and walks out of her room. We had a cute little routine, would sing a soothing song, rock her a bit on the rocking chair and then would put her down awake and leave the room - she would fall asleep on her own.
This began after we changed her bed although her routine didn’t change, same bedtime, same house, still wearing diapers at night - we are fully potty trained during the day (yay!).
Her normal bedtime is 7pm - if she falls asleep at that time she usually wakes up at around 6:45am/7am. But with this new resistance she literally takes two hours to fall asleep - yesterday she fell asleep at 10pm.
What should I do?
Do I sit on the rocking chair for two hours until she falls asleep?
Do I move her bedtime?
She is still napping at school, maybe she should skip her nap?
Answer
Whatever you do, don't skip the nap mom... but you can push the bedtime in 15 minute increments to get to 10 hours of sleep overnight rather than the 12 she was getting before. So one week 7:15pm, then next week 7:30pm..etc. until you get less resistance.
Also, she is fast approaching 3 which means a big burst in the development of memory and language. I am assuming that she is now speaking more and in full paragraphs that are understandable to all right? When there is a burst in development there is usually a delay in something else they have mastered, usually sleep or potty.
So that is the ‘why’ of the NEW push back...
What to do?
Be meticulous about your bedtime routine, which now includes sitting in the chair nearby. No talking, just a gentle shh...each time she talks. If she moves, wiggles, or does anything physical in the bed, no words, just stay in the chair. If she walks over to you, say "shh.." and gently walk her back, without words, no talking.
Work on your mood and your energy, this is the number one most important thing to do...this is frustrating and I am thinking that your energy while in her bedroom matches your mood...this affects her nervous system that picks up on your nervous system being off. So when you are in the chair the most important thing to do is to breathe and calm your body. Her mirror neurons will pick up on your calm
With pushing her bedtime to getting 10 hours overnight plus her nap at school, staying silent once lights are out, and working on your nervous system...this bump in the sleeping road will get better within 3 weeks.
Stay consistent and calm.