Question
We are only in week two of school and I am in homework hell. The girls get home and are tired and it's a battle. It's a screaming fight every single night. Any suggestions on how to alleviate this? We don't have the budget to hire tutors.
answer
Routine, Breathing, patience, timer.
According to educational standards, homework is 10 minutes per grade, also attention span for focus for typical children is 3 minutes X their age.
Using these numbers is how you pick the timer. You tell them, “we will do homework for 30 minutes” and say something like "I will start the timer and we will all be here until it goes off. Whatever you get done is what you will take to school. If you don't finish, we will make sure to do better tomorrow."
Then STICK TO THE TIMER PLAN NO MATTER WHAT.
Why?
Because it helps them tolerate emotions, you too, since you will be silent, breathing, and have a calm presence. No talking and no convincing besides "It's time for homework. I know its hard. Come back to the table".
Then again… BREATHING quiet and patient. When timer goes off all work stops.
It takes time to build this muscle and your girls have the extra hump of regulating emotion, which is what is in the way of getting the homework done.
For your parent brain remember - homework does not increase academic success, not in this age group. Reading does.
For now - iReady and all other computer programs that help them practice the test in April is not important to fight about.
Homework today is just their emotional cross fit to manage frustration, disappointment and responsibility.