question
The school is promoting a solidarity campaign in which we are supposed to deliver boxes to needy families with some basic goods. Each member of the family should make an outline of their hand as a symbolic gesture of "giving someone a hand", but my 8yo daughter refuses to do it. She also complained that we never buy her the kinds of biscuits that are in the box. She of course is too young to understand the importance of this, but I got pretty disappointed because I was expecting her to engage. What should I expect at this age?
answer
It’s normal for children 7 and younger but if you haven't given before then it’s fine that she feels how she does. Many children don’t have the context that people around them do not have the same privileges that they do.
Try to stay calm and loving through the process. The experience from beginning to end is what creates the memory and the motivation to be of service and kind to another. If she feels judged and misunderstood then this experience will backfire.
When she says I don’t have that! You can say, “that’s true my love, you don’t, and you’re feeling jealousy right now. But when you see the happiness in those we are helping I promise it won’t be so hard to give.”
Then maybe remind her how she feels joy when she’s nice to a friend or to you on Mother’s Day.
Relate gift giving to charity and it will make more sense to her.