Question

I've talked to you about my son in the past on one of your monthly group calls and you mentioned the public school he is currently at might not be the school for him. How do I determine what is an appropriate school for my son?
My husband and I met with you over 4 years ago when my son was in Kindergarten because we were having behavior problems with him in school. A Kindergarten teacher recommended I apply him for the Magnet program and you helped us transition him at the end of Kindergarten into the magnet class where he excelled in the last quarter. You never worked with him because you said it wasn't necessary. Since then he was recommended for gifted and has completed 2nd and almost 3rd grade in his gifted class but he doesn't fit in with this class. He is not what most consider to be "gifted" he doesn't have perfect handwriting, he will not sit and listen to you if he feels it is not necessary but the ability is there. My husband and I see it and so does his tutor but he does it only when he feels it is necessary and he is struggling. Right now there is a possibility he will not pass the FSA and would have to repeat third grade.

How do we know what is a good school or not? Should we take him out of gifted and just leave him in a magnet program where he was excelling? Should it be a private faith based school where they approach kids with compassion and love? (he thrives off that!)

All suggestions are welcome!

Answer

Perfect handwriting and sitting still is not a requirement for being Gifted. Sounds like he has lost interest for the class setting and the tasks.
It could be many things but this time of year can become hard for children because this is the time that the teachers begin to drill and practice for the standardized test, the famous FSA. All learning stops and memorizing and practicing begins.
It is possible that he has no urgency for memorizing, drilling and getting ready for the FSA so he chooses to tune out when the teachers begin their lesson that is surrounded around the FSA.
One route is to ask him about it. Wonder with him if the teachers are now practicing for the FSA and ask him what he thinks and feels about it. Then walk him through how a test like the FSA is the way that the school learns how much he has learned thus far. Tell him that the teachers practicing and repeating what they already taught is a way to make sure that he is ready for the test and that the test will show how much he has learned this year and what he may need to work on
Intelligent/gifted children don't really like hearing something more than once, when they think they already understand it. So it is very important to tell him that even if he already knows it, this month of March is about repeating the information like you would a song or a favorite movie to make sure you can memorize and say it back just right.

I hate writing that, just that last paragraph makes me cringe that an intelligent little one like your boy is probably bored because the learning has stopped and the studying for a useless test has begun, BUT that is the price of admission in a public school. The FSA scores pay the bills and so the teachers have to make sure the children do well on them.

2E is a term called Twice Exceptional and that term is for kids who are gifted but also have other differences. It is common for gifted children to also have ADHD and/or anxiety and/or sensory processing differences. It is so common, that this term of twice exceptional is used.

On what is the solution and what is the RIGHT school for him?

Define the test and find out how he is feeling around all the prep for FSA

You can choose to OPT him out of the FSA. Tell the school that he will not be taking it and that they can access him and whether they promote him to his next grade using his portfolio and work done thus far. He will still have to manage the prep time he will be in until April when they take the test but then the pressure of the stakes won't be as high. You can OPT him out. It's not against the law and don't let the school tell you otherwise.