Question
My son was frustrated today because we promised him some Robux money and the app was not working. I had to take my daughter to her class and in the rush I told him that I could figure it out after I dropped her off.
He started to tell his sister “call me idiot from now on” and then he took the charger cable, wrapped it around his neck and said he was going to kill himself. I immediately responded by asking why he felt that way and began to explain to him what it meant by saying that. As I was talking to him I began to cry and told him that in this family we loved him so much that we would never want him gone from the family.
I dropped off my daughter, went to my next stop and when we got off he apologized for what he said and said he was just frustrated with Roblox. I hugged and kissed him and told him how much we love him.
He is a very logical child. He understands when something isn’t working or if an app is not responding, he knows to wait for it or to troubleshoot it.
My son has struggled so much with his self confidence over the last two years that this just scares me. Did I respond ok, should I have said something different?
Answer
You responded perfectly. The best part of your response was the question.
His response to apologize and to say he was frustrated is proof that he got the message.
This is less about self-esteem and more about being overwhelmed with frustration. He did what a lot of us do, which is to go down our "negative" list of ALL the things we imagine are wrong when we are overwhelmed with emotion.