Question
I'm noticing that whenever someone else holds my 2-month-old (and I'm not around) she starts crying a lot. Last night, I feed her, changed her and gave her to my husband just for a little while so I could do a quick work out at the gym. When I came back, he said she was crying almost the whole time and nothing would comfort her...the same thing happened with my mother-in-law when she took care of her for a little while, as soon as I come back she is calm again. Is this the separation anxiety babies go through? I read about it somewhere, and I am wondering if this is what is causing her to be like that.
Answer
Infants have a preference for their primary care giver and it is normative. The task at hand is to give her opportunities to be in others' care, especially dad's care, for her to practice being without you. It will take her time to get used to the nanny, daddy, grandmother, but as she spends more time with them, she will begin to understand that they are safe as well. When the others are with her, make sure they narrate and tell her that you will be back soon. Also help them hold her the way that you do. It's true that crying is hard on babies, but she is not crying alone. She is expressing her lack of interest and disappointment of not being with you, while being cared for by another.