Do under 6 year-olds play sexually together?

Question

Good morning! Interesting question for you: one of my good friends has identical twin girls who just turned 4. The other day she caught them in the bathroom kissing on the mouth and showing each other their vaginas. She wasn't sure how to handle it. I have identical twin boys and wondered if the same thing can happen to boys - do they explore with each other? Is it twin thing? Is it a sibling thing? Or just an age thing? How should a parent handle it? I guess the level of explanation depends on the age but ultimately is it important to acknowledge their curiosity but discourage them for experimenting with one another?

Answer

It's a 3-6 year old thing. Most preschool teachers have multiple stories of little ones experimenting and being curious with each others bodies. When you see their curiosity then its the time to speak about private part safety, consent, and what the family values are around intimate touch. Sexual Development starts at birth and has different versions through out their development. In 3-6 they are curious about the body parts and about what they see their parents and caregivers do as it pertains to love. Having a twin or a sibling of similar age group makes the experimenting and curiosity accessible Here is an short snippet of my Healthy Sexual Development Handout I give at my talks on this topic